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Seven Weeks Ago Tonite …  

trixietrixster 52F  
1350 posts
7/16/2020 4:50 pm
Seven Weeks Ago Tonite …

… I was checked into a Motel 6, changed forever by the unhealthy relationship I just escaped from. Scared, anxious, my face fresh off a “milk carton”. A 16 month wreckage - wondering how and if I’d ever be able to find me again …

Nurturing relationships that I left behind. Nix that – the relationships that were taken away from me due to pure and total psychological manipulation. My D/s Mommy, she waited a long time for her babygirl to come home. I can’t even think this, let alone put it in type, without crying. I missed her so much! My ex-husband … if it weren’t for him … my mind doesn’t even want to go there, it’s not anywhere near a pretty place. We are dating again … our Poly status intact. Both of us working towards and hopeful that this time next year we will be sharing a dwelling together. At some point, possibly even remarry … 😊

My apartment is coming along nicely! I was gifted one of those plastic outside tables and four plastic chairs for my balcony. Took a trip to Home Depot and picked up blue spray paint. Almost had a fucking coronary in the blazing 95 degree heat – LOL – they look great!!! Scored a kitchen table brand new for 150 bucks. My D/s Mommy is gifting me chairs for it. Got a luvseat – of course – blue – great deal at 225 bucks new. Silverware, towels, bedsheets, comforter and a living room lamp (color doesn’t match – my OCD is going haywire!!!) and a few other things gifted from my cousins and aunt. Had a field day at the Dollar Store … LOL … picked up several items at Goodwill and thrifting. Blue, set of six dishes for 12 bucks, 4 pair of shorts for like 7 bucks, 3 summer dresses for 20 bucks. Scored an end table for the living room – 5 bucks. Put a skull & crossbones unicorn blankie over it! Air mattress is only tolerable for so long - bed frame just came in today - mattress in the next few days … 😊

*Side Note: in case you weren’t aware, Goodwill has pay by the pound outlets. The last time I was there pretty sure this was the pricing: 1-20: $1.79 pound, 20-50: $1.29 pound, 50 & Over: $.79 pound. Also, at their regular stores, the two color tags of the week that are 50% off are 1 dollar on Sundays. Everything – including furniture … 😊

Meanwhile, back at the ranch …

Getting back on track with my spirituality. Doing energy work, meditations. Working on mantras - they help provide a positive mindset thruout the day. During moments of remembering to breathe, they assist in keeping grounded and focused (for me). My issue: wordy – LOL – imagine that – go figure?! They are meant to be simple and short. Finding difficulty in condensing 30 words plus times 7 … 😊

Next hurdle – getting a job. Manifesting thru the Great Spirit the opportunity for a job that would be as close to perfect as it could be. (I don’t necessarily think there is a such thing as “perfection”). Asking the Universe to guide me to a job that I could make a difference in – a job in which I would be able to make life just that much easier for others. A job that fits into my life, as opposed to my life fitting into it. Being specific is super important. If you are a nite owl like me, chances are you would rather not have to be at work as the crows wake. No mixed signals … the Powers-That-Be can get confuzzled sometimes! ONE GETS ALL 100% OF WHAT THEY DON’T THEY DON’T ASK FOR … even if you get a fraction, it mite end up being you didn’t even get that had you not asked. We have to do our part … 😊

Ironically, on the one month anniversary of being a “free citizen”, I had my first interview. The Universe brought to me the chance to obtain exactly what it was I asked for. The more we talked, the more commonalities we shared. The more we talked, the more I knew this job was mine. Actually, I knew it while chatting on the phone and setting up a time to meet, as our connection was immediate. I’m the only one that even had an interview! After the tour, it was time for a background check. Apparently, I had a speeding ticket like 10 years ago, I do sorta kinda have a led foot when it comes to highway driving. Yep, that’s me … behind you in the left lane riding your ass … please, kindly at least go the speed limit! So, after 90 minutes, “can you start tomorrow?”. The Universe answered - brought to me a great opportunity … the perfect pseudo family to add to my life! 😊

Finding myself more each day, getting mentally healthy, getting the proper assistance for my medical issues. Been dabbling back in my writing little by little, got my coloring books out and jigsaw puzzles, all of which I haven’t had the slightest interest in for quite awhie. My luv of life – my luv of myself – starting to flourish. And, my want to be living among the freaks … 😊

The road behind me is full of broken concrete – desolate. The road in front of me, my present, the road in the distance, my future. Much better view … 😊


In Luv, Lite, Laffter ...


Lance_Goodthrust 63M
267 posts
7/16/2020 5:30 pm

Hello Trixie!!
Love you posting! Very glad for you that life and the Universe are being kind to you and bringing all that you need for this part of your life.
I know that we are so very far apart (you are in PA and I am in western Canada, just north of Minot, ND), but if you are ever in need of someone to talk with or just to celebrate the newest neat thing that has happened for you, please feel free to message me. I am a great listener and can assure you of privacy and discretion.
Good luck in your future, both personal and work. I am proud of you for taking all the steps you have and trusting yourself to make the right decisions for you.
Take care and stay well.


jolielaide 48F  
1393 posts
7/16/2020 7:53 pm

bravo, miss trixie, bravo for you

maya angelou's STILL I RISE is a testament to a woman's survival and her liberation


lindoboy100 57M
21573 posts
7/17/2020 1:15 am

Amazing McTrixster, what progress you've made in such a short space of time. I'm so happy for you, to hear you sounding so positive is heart warming! Lovely jubbly!

Pull ma finger.........


H8_2_W8 50F  
29 posts
7/17/2020 1:40 am

WOW little momma you've come a long way


Tmptrzz 57F
81863 posts
7/17/2020 9:10 am

I am so thrilled that the universe is aligning you with all the blessings you have asked for my friend. Congratulations on your new job as I hope it will be a happy one for you. And I am so happy for you that life is finally going in the direction you want it to be. I hope you and Hubby can work things out and get back together one day soon. As I know how much D/'s Mommy means to you.

I hope you have a fabulous Friday my friend..

Just your average every day run of the mill nana here!!!


trixietrixster 52F  
1581 posts
7/18/2020 4:19 pm

    Quoting Lance_Goodthrust:
    Hello Trixie!!
    Love you posting! Very glad for you that life and the Universe are being kind to you and bringing all that you need for this part of your life.
    I know that we are so very far apart (you are in PA and I am in western Canada, just north of Minot, ND), but if you are ever in need of someone to talk with or just to celebrate the newest neat thing that has happened for you, please feel free to message me. I am a great listener and can assure you of privacy and discretion.
    Good luck in your future, both personal and work. I am proud of you for taking all the steps you have and trusting yourself to make the right decisions for you.
    Take care and stay well.
It was only a matter of days before I was lost forever to those who left their porch lites on - before I was lost to myself. I'm living proof that the Great Spirit hears, that the Great Spirit can and does listen when spoken to! Thank you ever so much for your kind thoughts! Appreciate your stopping by - keep safe!

In Luv, Lite, Laffter ...


trixietrixster 52F  
1581 posts
7/18/2020 4:22 pm

    Quoting jolielaide:
    bravo, miss trixie, bravo for you

    maya angelou's STILL I RISE is a testament to a woman's survival and her liberation
Your thoughts are much appreciated - these help me stay focused and positive while entering a new chapter of my life! Maya Angelou is absolutely amazing ... your pic quote is wonderful, thank you!!!!!!!

In Luv, Lite, Laffter ...


trixietrixster 52F  
1581 posts
7/18/2020 4:35 pm

    Quoting lindoboy100:
    Amazing McTrixster, what progress you've made in such a short space of time. I'm so happy for you, to hear you sounding so positive is heart warming! Lovely jubbly!
Several times, I've had to do a double take ... some days my mind questioning my lucidity. My bed came in - WHOOT ... in the words of Ric Flair, The Nature Boy ... I'm styling and profiling! Been following wrestling since I was like 10 - LOL ... grateful for your kilted support ... *huggles*

In Luv, Lite, Laffter ...


trixietrixster 52F  
1581 posts
7/18/2020 4:47 pm

    Quoting H8_2_W8:
    WOW little momma you've come a long way
Thank you, thank you, thank you very much in my best Elvis voice! The support that I'm getting from friends and strangers (who are just friends you haven't had the privilege to get to know yet) has been overwhelming. Truly blessed I am! Hope your weekend has been a good one - stay safe!

In Luv, Lite, Laffter ...


trixietrixster 52F  
1581 posts
7/18/2020 4:53 pm

    Quoting Tmptrzz:
    I am so thrilled that the universe is aligning you with all the blessings you have asked for my friend. Congratulations on your new job as I hope it will be a happy one for you. And I am so happy for you that life is finally going in the direction you want it to be. I hope you and Hubby can work things out and get back together one day soon. As I know how much D/'s Mommy means to you.

    I hope you have a fabulous Friday my friend..
Your words of encourage mean so much to me, dear friend! Things are definitely on the upslide big time! We had lunch today - one minute at a time. And, he set up my bed ... ya, we probably broke it in ... HA!! I so very did - our reconnection has been and continues to be nothing less than spacfuckinglacular! Hope your day was an awesomeness as you ...

In Luv, Lite, Laffter ...


Dark_Star1972 48M
605 posts
7/18/2020 5:50 pm

A great post. Thanks for sharing!

The Darkstar

The Bearded One: Dark_Star1972
_______________________________


jolielaide 48F  
1393 posts
7/19/2020 12:37 am

    Quoting trixietrixster:
    Your thoughts are much appreciated - these help me stay focused and positive while entering a new chapter of my life! Maya Angelou is absolutely amazing ... your pic quote is wonderful, thank you!!!!!!!
continue to be like the air, miss trixie


trixietrixster 52F  
1581 posts
7/19/2020 2:09 am

Thank you for the kind words - nice to meet you ...

In Luv, Lite, Laffter ...


trixietrixster 52F  
1581 posts
7/19/2020 2:10 am

    Quoting jolielaide:
    continue to be like the air, miss trixie
Every fucking day ... wish the same for you ...

In Luv, Lite, Laffter ...


NJGUY08090 53M
3270 posts
7/19/2020 10:04 am

So nice to see things are in a better place for you. I know hard it can be but, you are doing a great job as you navigate through all the challenges in front of you. I'm very happy for you.


trixietrixster 52F  
1581 posts
7/19/2020 12:47 pm

    Quoting NJGUY08090:
    So nice to see things are in a better place for you. I know hard it can be but, you are doing a great job as you navigate through all the challenges in front of you. I'm very happy for you.
On the upslide for shizzle - thank you. And, keep safe ...

In Luv, Lite, Laffter ...


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